A New Contract: Mjolnir Strikes Back for the Return of Lightsabers

0
2390

The epic Twitter contract negotiations of Marvel and Star Wars heralded a heroic age of contract formation of offer, acceptance and consideration for the use of property.

The Twitter negotiations, however, also required trading Yoda, Hutts, plus Deadpool for Boba Fett, and Mace Windu for Nick Fury. The open discussions for trading human beings (and other living beings who are not animals or property), would violate the civil rights of those individuals, given the prohibition of indentured servitude. Moreover, @Marvel specifically rejected including any of Tony Stark’s armor in the negotiations out of fear Ewoks would be placed in them. As such, the parties discussion could be summarized as the following terms and conditions:

 The Marvel & Star Wars Lease Agreement of Lightsabers for Mjolnir 

@Marvel and @StarWars, both subsidiaries of Disney, hereby agree to the following terms and conditions:

@StarWars will lease to @Marvel one blue lightsaber, one green lightsaber, one purple lightsaber, one yellow lightsaber and one red lightsaber for the term of one week (7 day on Earth);

@Marvel will use the above mentioned lightsabers for scientific research.

@StarWars hereby warns @Marvel of the risk of injury of using said lightsabers, including loss of limbs, eye injury, blindness, beheading and even death.

In consideration for the use of the lightsabers, @Marvel will lend for a period of one week Mjolnir (7 days on Earth), making no warranties on whether anyone at @StarWars is worthy enough to lift Mjolnir.

@Marvel hereby warns @StarWars of the risk of injury for using Mjolnir, including lower back strain for attempting to lift, arm injury, dislocated shoulders, eye injury from lightening, hearing damage from thunder, electrocution, property damage from flooding, high winds, rain, or lightening strikes, and any other reasonably foreseeable injuries from attempting to control weather or throwing a hammer.

Choice of Law:

The parties agreements will be governed by the laws of the State of California.

Forum Selection Clause:

Any and all disputes will be heard in Anaheim, California, at Great Moments with Mr. Lincoln, and arbitrated by the animatronic Abraham Lincoln. The parties further agree to be bound by the arbitrator’s final decision on ay disputes, waiving all legal claims.

Waiver of Claims by @Marvel:

@Marvel waives any claims against @StarWars, its officers, agents, employees or volunteers from damage or loss caused by:

A. Any suit or proceeding directly or indirectly attacking the validity of this Contract, or any part of this Contract.

B. Any judgement or award: (i) declaring this Contract, or any part of this Contract, either void or voidable, or (ii) delaying the performance of any part of this Contract.

Waiver of Claims by @StarWars:

@StarWars waives any claims against @Marvel, its officers, agents, employees or volunteers from damage or loss caused by:

A. Any suit or proceeding directly or indirectly attacking the validity of this Contract, or any part of this Contract.

B. Any judgement or award: (i) declaring this Contract, or any part of this Contract, either void or voidable, or (ii) delaying the performance of any part of this Contract.

Express Agreement by Parties

Neither @Marvel or @StarWars will allow any of its officers, agents, employees or volunteers to use either a lightsaber or Mjolnir without a signed liability wavier for any injury sustained by using a lightsaber or Mjolnir. Children are expressly prohibited from using the property subject to this agreement.

Property Damage:

The parties will be financially responsible for any damage to the property subject to this contract.

Severability:

If any provision of this Contract is held invalid or unenforceable, its invalidity or unenforceability will not affect any other provisions of this Contract, and this Contract will be construed and enforced as if such provision had not been included.

Entire Agreement:

This Contract constitutes the entire agreement between @Marvel and @StarWars. Both parties revoke all prior or contemporaneous oral or written agreements between them that are inconsistent with this Contract. In the event of a dispute between the parties regarding the Contract, this Contract will be deemed to have been drafted by the parties in equal parts so that no presumptions or inferences concerning its terms or interpretation may be construed against any party to this Contract.

Leave a Reply