In 1993, Max Dennison moved to Salem, Massachusetts from Los Angeles, California. Along with his sister, Dani, his classmate, Allison, and a talking cat named Binx, he experienced a Halloween unlike any other. A skeptic of the spooky, Max lit the Black Flame Candle to try to prove the inexistence of witches and instead resurrected three unruly witch sisters: Winifred, Mary, and Sarah Sanderson. Though the witches wreaked havoc on Salem with various potions and spells, they also broke a few laws along the way. If their fates had ended differently- not in bursts of dust- these sisters just might have found themselves in front of a jury.
- Winifred Would Be Convicted of the First-Degree Murder of Billy Butcherson
As Binx explains, “Billy Butcherson was Winifred’s lover, but she found him sporting with her sister Sarah, so she poisoned him and sewed his mouth shut with a dull needle. So, he couldn’t tell her secrets, even in death.” Murder is the unlawful killing of a human being with malice aforethought. Every murder perpetrated by poison, lying in wait, or any other kind of willful, deliberate, malicious, and premeditated killing, is murder in the first degree. 18 U.S.C.A. § 1111. Though Winifred was envious of Billy’s fondness of her sister Sarah, she has absolutely no defense to killing the man. Also, her jealousy-fueled and deliberate mutilation is evidence of malice aforethought. Therefore, had it not been for her demise by the rising sun, Winifred probably have found herself with a significant sentence for the first-degree murder of Billy Butcherson.
- The Sanderson Sisters Kidnapped Dani Dennison (and Emily, Jay and ICE)
Per 18 U.S.C.A. § 1201, whoever unlawfully seizes, confines, inveigles, decoys, kidnaps, abducts, or carries away and holds for ransom or reward or otherwise any person, except in the case of a minor by the parent thereof, when any such act against the person is done within the special maritime and territorial jurisdiction of the United States, shall be punished by imprisonment for any term of years or for life and, if the death of any person results, shall be punished by death or life imprisonment. Not only do the Sanderson Sisters capture and suck the life out of young Emily Binx in 1693, they also kidnap both Jay and ICE (Max’s school bullies) after Jay calls the witches ugly. In addition, Winifred carries Dani off on her broom, in the hopes of making Dani drink a potion. Accordingly, in an alternate ending, the Sandersons would have inevitably faced hefty kidnapping sentences as well.
- The Sisters Participate in Fare Evasion When They Ride the Bus for Free
When the Sanderson Sisters find themselves in front of a bus, they tell the driver they desire children and he welcomes them aboard, assuming they are dressed up for Halloween. Though the driver granted his permission, the witches did not pay for the ride. In some jurisdictions, fare evasion is considered a misdemeanor, and in others it is still subject to fines. Despite being the least of these criminal witches’ legal concerns, they might find themselves faced with a fare evasion fine as well. Or, in other words, they put the spell on us, but now they’re fined!
It is uncontested that the Sanderson Sisters were up to no good. Their goal was quite literally to suck the lives out of children to become young and beautiful themselves. It is comforting to know, that even if their plan played out in their favor and the witches found themselves young once again, they would most likely be spending those regained years behind bars. At the end of the day, it was not “just a bunch of hocus pocus,” it was a bunch of criminal activity!
