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Court Blasts “Terran Tempus” Guru Back to Suspension with Time Travel History Lesson, “This Nut Job’s Tryin’ To Kill Us All!” fumes UNA Appellate Judge

Opinion of the Court

COURT OF APPEALS OF THE UNITED NORTH AMERICA

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No. 2195.03.15223

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ROBERT XIAOTONG XANDO v. UNITED NORTH AMERICA

ON WRIT OF HABEAS CORPUS CHALLENGING LIFE SUSPENSION

[March 15, 2195]

Judge Amukamara-Ping delivered the opinion of the Court.

         We revisit the irreconcilable tension in the space-time continuum between Time Transitioners and the continuity of our universe.  On January 15, 2194, Robert Xiaotong Xando was arrested by officers of the Time and Transportation Security Administration (“TTSA”) at the Time Transition Facility (“TTF”) in New Phoenix, Arizona.  Following a bench trial, Xando was convicted of attempting to enter a foreign object into the space-time continuum in violation of the Time Travel Act (“TTA”), 18 U.S.N.C. § 2815 and 40 C.F.R. § 890.103.  Xando contends the lower court does not have jurisdiction over the action, or alternatively, erred by failing to properly consider his defenses.  For the following reasons, we affirm Xando’s conviction.

I. FACTUAL BACKGROUND

         Robert Xando is a time transition (old English: time travel) enthusiast from New Laredo, UNA.  Since the TTA was amended to permit one annual time transition event per qualifying citizen in 2176, see 18 U.S.N.C. § 2814(b), Xando has elected and paid for the opportunity every year.  During each of these prior 18 events, Xando’s fully complied with all statutory and regulatory requirements for Travelers. See 40 C.F.R. § 890.010 et seq.  Xando commonly wrote about these experiences, detailing the procedural process of transitioning time periods on his public cloud, TransitionTalk.RX.

         On February 21, 2193, Xando paid and provided certifications for his annual time transition event.  As part of complying with 40 C.F.R. § 890.230’s requirements, Xando geno-certified that he “would not bring, or attempt to bring, a foreign object . . . into the [TTF].”  Despite this certification, TTSA Agents conducting routine electromagnetic radiation sweeps observed a suspect object on Xando’s person as he entered the New Tucson TTF on January 15, 2194.  Upon secondary search, a small card (the “note”) was discovered concealed within the lining of his transition suit.

         Xando was subsequently taken into custody and charged with attempting to enter a foreign object into the space-time continuum in violation of the Time Travel Act (“TTA”), 18 U.S.N.C. § 2815 and 40 C.F.R. § 890.103.  Xando was ultimately convicted and sentenced to permanent life suspension. 18 U.S.N.C. § 2815(e)(3).  Pending his commitment to the Life Suspension Facility at Toronto, see Goldsmith v. United North America, 2095.11.16421 (CA-UNA), he now appeals that conviction.  We review all claims de novo.  C.Crim.Pr. 123.57.

II. DISCUSSION

1. This Court’s Temporal and Corpus Jurisdiction

         Xando first challenges, as he did in the lower court, our temporal and corpus jurisdiction to hold or hear charges against him based on the fact that (1) he is from a future time period and knows the current universe remains unchanged, and (2) that he is not a citizen of the United Northern America (“UNA”), but “Relinquished that Citizenship in Favour of His Majesty’s Service in a Colony of the Balkan Federation of 2142.”

         As stated by the lower court, the answer to those challenges are firmly established in our jurisprudence.  First, “[t]hat we are here to hear this case is evidence alone that the universe remains unchanged; however, it does not diminish this Court’s ability to weigh the evidence or apply the law against [the defendant].”  United North America v. McKay, 2163.11.09342 (CC-UNA) (denying defendant’s claims that he is from a later time period and thus cannot be subject to the Court’s temporal jurisdiction).  Last, Xando’s visa and pre-Transition certification both explicitly stated that he “was submitting and subjecting [himself] to the jurisdiction, authority, and temporal control of the [UNA] upon entry of the [TTF].”  See 18 U.S.N.C. § 2802(a).  We therefore affirm the lower court’s ruling that it has jurisdiction over Xando en toto.

         But because this Court is of the belief that Xando is an adherent of the Terran Tempus Autonomus psuedolaw movement—whose adherents resemble the Sovereign Citizens and Freemen of the Land of the 20th Century—we provide a longer response to Xando’s allegations that “No TERRAN Can Be Judged For ACTS that Do Not EFFECT [sic] or ALTER tempus corpus.”  

         Following the discovery of the rifts in Old Khartoum, New African Union (“NAU”) (“TEAR-1”) and New Phoenix, UNA (“TEAR-2”), the early 22nd Century power struggles in Africa, the Chinese Collective States, and central America resulted in the populist-driven New United League of Unions (“NULU”).  The newly formed UNA and NAU adopted resolutions approving NULU’s Civil and Criminal Codes.  Among those were Time Transition Criminal Act, passed by unanimous vote in NULU General Assembly in 2162, stating:

Acknowledging the unruly yet delicate string holding the entire Universe at her mercy, these Unions hereby commit to Sincere and Unyielding Control of the [rift sites]; whereby current temporal and spatial dimensions shall be maintained consistent with Article I;

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and any Person(s) caught within the [physical jurisdiction] of a Union’s [rift site] shall be subject to their full jurisdiction, authority, corporal and temporal punitive discretion, without exception or appeals.

NULU Charter, Art. IV, § 200.1.  See also 18 U.S.N.C. § 2802 (enacted 2162).  Because Xando was taken into custody as he entered a UNA TTF in 2194, any claims relating to lack of jurisdiction are forfeit.  Morley v. United North America, 2164.01.22341 (CA-UNA).

2. Time Travel Act, 18 U.S.N.C. § 2800 et seq.

         Following enactment of the TTA, which later established and directed enforcement authority of time transitions to the TTSA, a regulatory scheme was put in place to ensure that “joint Union scientific ventures may retain access for stabilization and exploration.”  § 2800(a). By 2170, NULU’s General Assembly restricted all transitions to “observatory,” as later defined by 40 C.F.R. 810.020, and integrated a scheme for public access to Union citizens.  Consistent with NULU Charter, Art. III, any qualifying Union citizen would be permitted access to one time transition event in their lifetime.  § 2810.  By 2176, however, a qualifying citizen was eligible for one TTE per year, see § 2847(b)(2)(iii), and a recent 2195 NULU Investigative Committee Report found that some black markets offer circumvention of security measures that allow up to three TTEs pre calendar year, see NIC-UNDOJ Report 2192.12.12998.

         In the entire history of legislation of time transition, from the 2162 NULU Charter through the most recent revisions to the USNC, the following has been absolutely prohibited:

To Attempt or Complete, the act of Entering Oneself, Extension, or a [foreign] Object into the [Space-time Continuum].

See NULU Charter, Art. IV, § 280; § 2815 (adopting Charter).  Since the earliest written record of the common law, sovereigns have criminalized attempting an act and punishing that attempt as if it were completed.  See I. de S. and Wife v. W. de S, At the Assizes, coram Thorpe, C.J. (1348).  As part of TTSA’s regulations, 40 C.F.R. § 890.230 explains that “‘foreign objects’ are any object, not organic[] to one’s own self, that are not approved by the [TTSA Controlling Authority].”

          And the U.N.A Constitutional Court has determined that “entering, or attempting to enter, can include such acts as placing, … displaying, concealing,” and is “no more connected to intent than the butterfly that flaps its wings” for constitutional purposes.  Krisotnis-Xi v. United North America, 2162.05.05429 (CC-UNA). As a result, we have validated the practice of pre-TTF arrival arrests when individuals are carrying “foreign objects” containing harmful material that “merely cross the threshold of planning.” Gonzalez-Rodriguez v. United North America, 2162.12.24771 (CA-UNA) (citing Krisotnis-Xi).

         Here, Xando was arrested walking into the New Tucson TTF at 21:42 on January 25, 2194, with a note concealed on his person. Subsequently, the government charged him under 18 U.S.N.C. § 2815 and 40 C.F.R. § 890.103, certifying that “the note, …, is consistent with and included within the [TTA’s] definition of “foreign object.” See Xando Indictment (2194.01.26085). Challenging the government’s indictment on appeal, Xando claims that his charging document failed to specify what made the note a prohibited “foreign object.” Furthermore, he contends the lower court erred because he presented evidence at trial that (1) “[he] failed to enter the [TTF Protected Area] or actually Place an Object into the [time space continuum],” and (2) he “is a ScienceMAN of NOTABLE repute, … and can Certify the Note’s INERT Nature,” by failing to credit his “extensive TIME TRAVEL Knoledge [sic].”

         While the contents of the note remain under seal, in camera review revealed the UNA Government has “met its burden to show that a ‘plausible’ opportunity existed to irreparably alter the universe.” Krisotnis-Xi, 2162.05.05202. The Court also affirms the lower court’s finding that Xando has no formal Transition training or certification. From the record, it appears his knowledge concerning the delicate balance of the space-time continuum was wholly gleamed from 20th Century science fiction and his personal experience transitioning within the Government’s confined terms and boundaries for public access. Accordingly, he has not met his burden of “proving through scientific methods and to a greater degree of certainty [the invulnerability of space-time] than those time transition forefathers whose admonitions formed the basis for NULU Charter, Art. I.”  Gonzalez-Rodriguez, 2162.12.24560 (detailing inherent and untenable risk of irrevocable harm to our universe in the event of a breach in the time-space).

III. Conclusion

         Although the U.N.A. Government (by adoption of the NULU’s Charter) may permit and encourage its citizens to make use of its TTFs, thereby allowing the public to view (from afar) our world’s greatest historical moments from Michelangelo in the Sistine Chapel to the building of the Great Pyramids, that privilege is not without harsh and unyielding requirements.  We do not affirm Xando’s sentence and commit him to complete life suspension lightly; however, we quote the words of our first NULU Secretary General Manuel O’Kelly XI:  “Our world shall never again know the peace of an undisturbed or unthreatened history or future.  Because we cannot ever allow that which would change and possibly destroy this universe, we treat those who would attempt to do so as treasonous enemies of everything we now hold dear.”

AFFIRMED.

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